Miss Me?? ....... Stop Lyin'!!

I haven't blogged in a good while.
I've been busy in the world, if you will. Nope, I'm not that important, but it does sound like I am right?
I'd love to get into a nice groove of blogging a few times a week if I can, but I'm a Pisces, so with me you never really know.
I've missed this, really.
A chance to just let go and complain without feeling guilty about perpetuating negativity.
OK, fantastic, so....whats been happening? Well...

My top 10 lesbian lovers list is almost complete, I'm up to about nine and I'm giving the last one a bit more thought, to round out the bunch nicely...these things take time.

My "vegetarian that still eats fish" diet is coming along most splendidly. I'm down 28 pounds. When I tell most people that I'm 28 pounds lighter, they say "Really? Where?" Bastards.
But, nevertheless the scale doesn't lie, well unless I "make" it lie.
I feel loads better and am happy at the lifestyle change.

I still don't understand how some people can eat yellow mustard. It might be the most revolting thing on this planet. Wait no, the planet isn't big enough. I hate it. Die.

I'm sure there are a bunch of other things, however I'm getting sleepy so...
I hardly ever get a chance to just rest, so guess what I'm going to do today? You're so smart.

Love ya...

Ta Ta

Healthcare with Some Poo and a Broken Hip

I hate the color yellow...
Idk why but yellow is just a dumb color...
But I do have a Spongebob t-shirt that I just can't part with...don't judge me.

Today is Tuesday and not much has happened... I watched an old lady slip in my dog's poo earlier.
It was a bit funny but what if she had like fell and broken her hip and slowly drowned from internal bleeding? Not cool.

I'm not quite sure how I feel about Obama's healthcare reform just yet...we'll see how it turns out.
I don't understand why people are flipping out now, he TOLD us that this was what he wanted to do...and we elected him...so why are people surprised that he's actually doing something that he SAID he was going to do? Smh...

On another note, Obama is probably great in the sack...

Pain...not like a sexy S&M pain tho...

I stubbed my freaking toe on this god damn chair and I want to slap somebody in the mouth!!
Shit.

Patriotic Eggs and The Pipe Layer...

I was craving scrambled eggs all day today, so I rushed home to cook them...is that weird?

eh...doesn't matter...they were awesome.

One of my exes told me that it was all in the whipping of the egg. He said I shouldn't stop scrambling until I was pouring directly into the pan...as nicely as he was laying it down...I didn't care what he was talking about...I just smiled and agreed.

His head game was also ridiculous...(Mommy, stop reading)...which means he pretty much got away with more than I would normally allow.

Yes I say allow because I'm not the one to really settle for something less than what I give, which is a lot.

Isn't it funny how sex controls us sometimes? How much we tolerate is directly related to how great the sex in the relationship is. Smh. Does that make us all simple twits, or lust-thriving freaks? Well its better than what some foreign alliance leaders call us.

btw-Like America, most of the people that you think love/wanna be you...Don't!

God I Love Being Me...Until I Start to Age!

Yo! Whats the happs?? Too weird? OK...
So, I'm about to be 20-freaking-8! Now when it comes to other people turning 30 it's not even close to being old, but when I think about actually turning 30....It feels a bit too soon.
I had so many "things" that I wanted to accomplish before I turned 30 such as:
[] Marriage to someone who gets me, and wants the same things I do (Like sex and ice cream at 4 am.)
[] Children...I want 4 but, people say I'll change my mind after the first one!
[] 3 consecutive hot air balloon rides.
[] To fire a 12 gauge.
[] Travel to a different country every few years with my mom and husband and rugrats.
[] Learn to friggin' ice skate without my ass being blue and purple the next morning.
[] See every movie in the theater on one day. Ha!
[] Wear one purple shoe and one yellow shoe all day and see what reaction I get from people!
[] Go snorkeling or Scuba diving!
[] Play real truth or dare, like the REAL one with Jack Daniels and a whip.
[] Skip all day instead of walk!!

Among other things...maybe I can still squeeze some of these in!!
I certainly don't feel old at all...It's just all in my head...like the voice that tells me to snatch lollipops from toddlers.

I'm Back!!....To My Regular Self That Is...!

You know I would have been here to talk to the world if I could have. :-(

I had well still have really a bout with Gastroenteritis. Not. Fun.

I'm pretty sure I screamed for Jesus to "take me now" at least 12 times a day.

All because of food poisoning from a Mexican Restaurant. Bastards, I should burn the fucking place to the ground.

I would post their name here and urge everyone to forgo the fajitas with a side of vomit, but I'm keeping my court cases to a minimum.

I don't have much to update really... Just the usual me trying to push my body to get better quicker than it would like to. Basically I'm being forced to slow down which may or may not be a great thing. But...eh well...

I've missed mah bloggin'...it felt like forever.

But, mommas home!

Enjoy your day weekend psychos! :-)

I Can't Believe You Did This!?! Wait, Yes I Can, Because You're A Dick!

I got kicked in the gut today...



Identity theft that I thought was resolved two years ago....hasn't been.

Some dude named Glen Nimakoecheng or some shit...stole my damn identity and is now fucking up my chance slowing down the process of me buying a house! Bastard.



So, every person that I see today who looks like his fucking name is Glen, I'm going to flip him the bird and spit on his shoes!



I'll update later if I don't get arrested.

It's shit like this that makes me want to put bleach in some ladies water bottle at the gym.

FYI: Anger management classes don't fucking work.